Connect with us

Life

What Is The Ick? Heres What To Do When Sparks (Donu2019t) Fly

Published

on

Picture it: You’re on a romantic date with your S.O.—candlelit table, bouquet of roses, chocolate-covered strawberries. It should feel like the climax of your favorite rom-com, but it just feels…wrong. Suddenly, you cringe at your partner’s touch. Their sexual allure dissipates. The mere thought of romance existing between you? Ew. You hate the way they do, well, anything (they breathed? unforgivable), and their personality is a huge turn-off. Little quirks that never bothered you before, like how they slurp their drink, pick the raisins from their salad, or drone on about their record collection, are now intolerable. No doubt about it: You’ve got The Ick.

Phrase sound familiar? That’s probably because a Sex and the City episode titled “The Ick Factor” popularized it years ago. More recently, “The Ick” resurfaced on British Love Island season six when (spoiler alert!) Leanne out-of-the-blue dumped Mike. Interest is surging—which is why The Ick needs an unpacking, like, yesterday.

Okay, so… what exactly is ‘The Ick’?

“When you have a crush, your body and mind become excited and feed off each other,” says WH advisor Chloe Carmichael, PhD, a clinical psychologist in New York. “We call that a psychosomatic reaction.” The Ick sparks a similar response but results in the opposite symptoms. “It’s like a sense of repulsion. You’ll notice a sudden absence of arousal that you used to feel about someone,” she explains. When they kiss your neck, it feels like a grotesque slug sliming down to your clavicle. Their make-out technique hasn’t changed—your perception of it has.

You shouldn’t want to social distance from your S.O.

How can you tell when you’ve caught The Ick?

Like the way you’re grossed out by the smell of rotten food, your body may be sending a message when you feel The Ick, says Carmichael. “It’s healthy to have a revulsion toward what’s not good for us.” Think of it as a defense mechanism, making you realize this person is toxic or, at least, signaling that something is off. (But it’s not the only Ick inducer—more on that later.) While the relationship may not be categorically harmful—you’re just fed up with your spouse’s chewing— it’s helpful to explore why your body is urging you to flee. Be honest with yourself to get clarity.

Should you stick it out or run for the hills?

A quick PSA: Just because you have The Ick doesn’t mean you have to jump ‘ship right away. (Get it?) Before hopping in the life raft, check out these expert-approved next steps.

First of all, ask yourself: Is it just the novelty fading? New couples often take part in what Carmichael calls “relationship bingeing.” Translation: You’re so excited about a new partner that you end up spending all your free time with them. But when you’re around someone 24/7 (no matter how long you’ve been married!), it’s only natural to want alone time, says Janet Brito, PhD, a clinical psychologist and sex therapist in Honolulu. Do a solo activity to decompress, then reevaluate your icky feelings, she suggests.

Okay, but what if it’s more about you, not them? For real. Feeling ugh about getting intimate could signal unresolved emotions around your ability to give and receive love, Brito says. Affectionate, private moments are necessary to relationships, and if you can’t deal, you may have some internal work to do before jumping into dating or rekindling the spark in your long-term partnership. Working with a therapist or discussing issues with your S.O. can help.

Reignite real romance by forgoing fairy-tale ideals.

What do you do if it’s really not you, it’s them?

Sometimes there’s just no work-through-it fix that can adequately address the problem. If you repeatedly feel The Ick around someone more often than feelings of arousal, love, or joy (like, their perceived yuckiness is as much a part of your routine as your a.m. workout), it’s likely time to go in a different dating direction, says Brito. No need to reveal your repulsion; just (kindly) say your feelings have changed—period. Married, with little ones involved? Use these dire-straits vibes as final motivation to get help and truly explore what’s going on.

How to Ick-proof your relationship, like, right now:

Attraction has its normal ebbs and flows, but consider these must-dos your new Ick repellents. (Phew!)

Source: Read Full Article

Continue Reading

Life

Fashion’s fallen for the horsey set’s classic coat

Published

on

How to dress like a grown up with Shane Watson: Fashion’s fallen for the horsey set’s classic coat

  • Shane Watson shares advice for embracing this season’s quilted coats trend 
  • Suggests coats below the knee or longer, and avoiding popper fastenings
  • UK-based fashion expert takes inspiration from Jordana Brewster

The question I’ve been wrestling with (wrestling might be a bit strong), is where do I stand on quilted coats and jackets?

For a start, my parents’ generation wore quilted vests to stave off the draughts in their very-much-not-insulated houses.

I look at quilted coats and think of wellies and dog whistles, sheep wrangling and horse feed, and struggle to see them as any more stylish than an oilskin and sou’wester.

On the other hand, all you have to do is nip in to your local M&S, Zara or John Lewis to realise that quilted coats and jackets are as fashionable as biker boots a decade ago — and at the start of that trend I remember being less than convinced.

Shane Watson shares advice for embracing this season’s quilted coats trend at any occasion. Pictured: Jordana Brewster

Too heavy, I thought. Too utilitarian. Too ugly. Yet within months biker boots had become glamorous, youth imbuing and generally all-round desirable.

Which is a long-winded way of saying I’m well aware the fashions we don’t get instantly, are often the ones that prove most enduring — especially when they have a lot going for them, practically.

Not long ago you could easily buy a parka or padded jacket that was not even shower proof; but these quilted cover ups are 100 per cent weatherproof. There’s nothing frivolous about this fashion.

So, the next question is, does a quilted coat serve a different purpose from your parka/duvet/padded coat? The quick answer to that is yes. I think so. It’s thinner, it’s lighter, you can wear it with a bag strap slung across it. It’s like the difference between a light padded gilet and a dryrobe, those coats wild swimmers love.

And, last but not least, there’s a noticeable difference between a quilted jacket Jeremy Clarkson might wear on his farm and the one you’ll be wearing if you take the bait. Which — having tried on a few — I can see that you might.

Apart from being so light that the coat you walked into the shop wearing by contrast feels like concrete, the quilted coat or jacket can look quite nippy. It has that wholesome country-casuals-meets-Europrincess vibe; it’s built for a British winter but, is also neat and a bit bourgeois dressy, like a velvet ribbon-tied ponytail.

It’s all about how you wear it (with a polo neck peeking out one end and a midi hem and boots, the other); the colour (sage green or khaki if it’s a coat; green or navy if it’s a jacket . . . don’t be tempted by bright colours); and length. If it’s a coat it should finish just on or below the knee so it looks leaner and can’t be mistaken for a padded anorak.

QUILTED COATS : RULES 

  • Go quilted not padded
  • Keep coats below the knee or longer
  • Try khaki or navy
  • Avoid popper fastenings

The gold-standard jacket is Barbour’s fake-fur-lined version (£169, barbour.com). Boden does a cute jacket in khaki or navy with a fat, faux- fur detachable collar (£150, boden.co.uk) which is all to the good, as this quilted jacket’s appeal is its simplicity. Cos has an ultra-plain reversible jacket in navy (£99, cosstores.com) which would also work well under a coat.

However, as we get into winter, a coat, with a hood, will be more useful.

Zara has a good one with an adjustable hem, parka style (£59.99, zara.com) and a straighter version, also hooded (£79.99, zara.com). Cos has a long-line quilted coat in khaki (£135, cosstores.com). Marks & Spencer has something similar in hunter green but belted (£79, marksandspencer.com) so, for the slimmer customer then; I can’t see quilting and belts working for most.

Massimo Dutti has a wide range of quilted coats including one in high-shine glossy green (£169, massimodutti.com) with a detachable hood.

Honestly, you can walk into any shop on the High Street and find an entire quilting section with lots of choice and you can’t go far wrong — though beware bulky cuts (this coat shouldn’t pile on pounds) and unnecessary details, like breast pockets.

Will it change your life? No, but if you’re bored stiff of that padded coat and your parka has seen better days, this is where you should be looking. And the quilties are starting to look more on the money than other weatherproof coats. They’re definitely growing on me.

Source: Read Full Article

Continue Reading

Life

Kate Middleton Made 1 Eco-Friendly Move With Her Outfit at the Earthshot Prize

Published

on

Prince William recently launched the inaugural Earthshot Prize, a huge initiative to combat climate change. Of course, Kate Middleton was right there alongside him to show support. Because of the theme of the event, Kate donned an outfit that showed off her eco-friendly mindset.

Kate Middleton supported Prince William at the Earthshot Prize

On October 17, 2021, William launched the first-ever Earthshot Prize ceremony. It highlighted many innovations around the world that are playing their parts in helping the environment. The award ceremony included a total of 15 finalists and five winners in various categories.

Kate was there to support William in his groundbreaking project. The Duchess of Cambridge was one of the award presenters for the event. She handed out the prize for the Protect and Restore Nature category to the country of Costa Rica for its efforts in restoring rainforests.

“Nature is vital to us all. A thriving natural world regulates our climate, nurtures our physical and mental health, and helps feed our families,” Kate said in her speech.

Other stars at the Earthshot Prize include Emma Watson, Ed Sheeran, Coldplay, and Emma Thompson. The Prize will also become an annual event and be hosted by other countries in the future.

Kate Middleton made an eco-friendly move with her outfit

True to its message, the Earthshot Prize tried to be as eco-friendly as possible. Participants were encouraged to join via video calls instead of flying into London. Musical performances were also powered by 60 cyclists.

Kate, whose fashion always garners a lot of attention, made sure her outfit reflected the message of Earthshot as well. She re-wore an Alexander McQueen gown that she donned to the 2011 BAFTA. According to Marie Claire, in re-wearing an outfit, Kate seems to be sending a message about overconsumption. This is, indeed, a big problem in the fashion industry and one that is contributing to environmental degradation. 

Other participants also tried to be eco-friendly with their fashion statements. For example, according to E! News, Emma Watson wore a top made from 10 wedding dresses.

Kate Middleton has re-wears clothes many times

Kate is no stranger to recycled outfits. Ever since she joined the royal family in 2011, she has re-worn clothes many times.

In fact, Kate specifically re-wears items when she attends weddings. Kate attracts a lot of attention everywhere she goes, and this seems to be a way for her to shift some attention to the bride and groom at hand.

When she attended Prince Harry’s 2018 wedding to Meghan Markle, Kate donned a cream Alexander McQueen coat dress that she already wore three years earlier at her daughter’s christening. Similarly, at the wedding of Princess Eugenie and Jack Brooksbank a few months later, Kate wore a pink Alexander McQueen dress that was similar to something she wore at Trooping the Colour in 2017.

Source: Read Full Article

Continue Reading

Life

‘RHOSLC’ recap: Mary Cosby ‘would change’ husband to fit her needs

Published

on

More On:

mary cosby

‘RHOSLC’ star Mary Cosby tells castmate Jennie Nguyen to ‘shut up’

‘RHOSLC’ Lisa Barlow addresses Mary Cosby’s ‘crazy’ cult allegations 

Lisa Barlow takes a dig at Whitney Rose in ‘RHOSLC’ sneak peek

Whitney Rose blasts Mary Cosby’s ‘crazy’ and ‘baseless’ Twitter accusations

Will her prayer be answered?

In Sunday night’s episode of “The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City,” Mary Cosby revealed that she would transform her husband, Bishop Robert Cosby Sr., into an entirely different human being if she could. 

“I could be wrong for this but I would change Robert Sr.,” the Bravo star, 48, said in a confessional. “I would just, like, change him, the whole person, to what I want in him that I don’t get.” 

Mary added that her decades-long marriage to Robert Sr. has been “exhausting.” 

“You want him to say, ‘[I’m] sorry,’ you want him to be passionate, you want him to just be alive,” she elaborated, listing the qualities she feels her spouse is devoid of. “And then you have Robert Sr.”

Mary inherited her late grandmother Rosemary “Mama” Redmon Cosby’s Faith Temple Pentecostal Church and multimillion-dollar estate after the elder preacher’s 1997 death. Mary later married her step-grandfather and Mama’s husband, Robert Sr. (The two are not blood-related.)

Mary has previously expressed that she did not want to enter into the unconventional marriage, but eventually conceded to the arrangement as to honor her late grandmother’s wishes. 

While taking a break from a tennis game with castmate Meredith Marks in this week’s installment of “RHOSLC,” the religious leader opened up more about her home life with Robert Sr.

“I remember when I got my own bedroom — because you know Robert Sr. and I don’t share a bedroom. We don’t sleep in the same room,” Mary told the jewelry designer. “And he’s like, ‘This is your room.’ And I’m like, ‘What do you mean, my room?’”

She continued, “At first I was like, ‘OK, this is weird. OK, you’re going in there? OK, good night.’ But then, I don’t know what I’d do without my own room. I think there’s dynamics to relationships that work.”

Mary also explained to Marks, 49, that she is dreading the day her and Robert Sr.’s 18-year-old son, Robert Jr., moves out of the family’s palatial Utah home. 

“If Robert Jr. leaves my house, then it’ll just be Robert Sr. and I all the time. I just find that strange. I want to live Italian-style where they live at home until they get married,” she said. “My son is part of our life and a part of our marriage and a part of us for the last 18 years.”

Mary — who, in addition to worrying about her husband, is embroiled in rumors that she’s running a “cult” — went on to say that she is in no way looking forward to rediscovering who Robert Sr. is once their nest is empty. 

“Our whole marriage is based on this kid, so it’s almost like I have to relearn this man,” she told the camera. “From knowing what I know now, I don’t want to get to know him and I just see, like, a disaster.”

“The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City” airs Sundays at 9 p.m. ET on Bravo. 

Share this article:

Source: Read Full Article

Continue Reading

Trending